Worry, confidence
That’s me a few days ago, just a stones throw from home.
Erik has been in Iraq about two months, now. I got a phone call from him the other morning, and he’s doing well. Olga and Gavin each got to talk to him, and Olga told him it was high time he came home. She has really been missing him. Yesterday Erik missed the first of several family holidays he’ll miss in the coming months.
Well before he left, I made a conscious decision to be okay through this deployment. Erik always tells me: if you can’t change it, don’t worry about it. I certainly can’t change the fact that Erik is deployed, nor that he’s in danger, or that he’ll be gone so long. So I decided not to worry about him at all.
Instead, I’m devoting all of my energy into doing something constructive for our family, which in turn always helps out Erik in the end. Because the less he has to worry about us at home, the better he can concentrate on the matters before him, and the more likely he is to come home to us safely.
One of the things I do while he’s away is shoot a few targets now and then. I got a nice confidence boost from shooting a decent group at 50 yards with the AR-15 the other day. That’s essentially the same rifle Erik uses in Iraq. The one I shot doesn’t belong to me, but I like it so much that I may end up getting one. All that confidence gets lumped back into that constructive energy, instead of withering into worry, and in the end, we’re all better off.
I am a member of the NRA and very much a proponent of 2nd ammendment rights, but I would not find it necessary to post a picture like this to “inspire confidence.” I found you to be more inspiring and confident before this picture. Thank you for reading and considering this comment, and I hope you do not take offense at it…
As someone who has had a husband deployed with little kids at home, I can relate to your post very much. Fear usually stems from not being prepared. Good for you! Take control of your emotions while he’s deployed because we both know that worry can eat you alive if you let it. I love your blog and your craftiness.
I am very proud of you, Annie! So many women (men too!) don’t know the first thing about using a gun. My dad taught me many years ago but all has been forgotten. STAY SHARP!!!
Hey Girl – I can’t see your pictures while I’m deployed (they won’t load on this work computer) but I can sure read the title. My John put in a requisition for two assault rifles as soon as Obama was elected…and in our state of Florida, he had to search and search for a store with any inventory at all. I know the assault weapons ban will be tabled again as soon as he’s inaugurated…so buy while you still can.
Really proud of you!
Good job, Annie; keep up the practice! You’re right, the more competent and secure (in all things) you and the little ones are at home, the less Erik will worry about not being there to take care of you. The less he worries about you, the more he can pay attention to his own surroundings, and the more likely he is to come home safe and sound. Isn’t that a flip – YOU’RE keeping HIM safe!
Keep up the rifle practice. It’s fun, it’s relaxing (to me at least – having to focus 100% on accuracy drives out the annoying brain-buzz from misc. garbage), and it’s a good skill to have, and one that needs regular practice to maintain.
Oh, and continue posting stories and pics like this whenever you can. Anybody disturbed by them is someone who is just disturbed.
annie,
you’re such an inspiration. you’re so right–it’s good to be active and prepared while difficult things are going on. you made my day.